Koffi Olomide Deported

Wow.. wow.. Kenyans on social media are just crazy. Did the Congolese guy just get deported??

Let’s raise the same issue and see if a few things could be corrected in Kenya like tribalism, corruption and stuff.

But wait.. if a foreigner misbehaves in our country, we can deport them.. if Kenyans misbehave in Kenya necessarily Nairobi, shouldn’t they be sent back to their respective villages??

If a guy slaps me

Can we start by saying a small prayer and hope it never happens?
Thanks

The first time I was slapped by someone I was in form 1. Fresh into secondary school. I made fun of my Biology teacher who heard it.. and well, not really fun.. I was just concerned if he would reach the blackboard  since he was very short.. could we just say I was concerned??

Well, in the light of recent event ( Congolese star Koffi Olomide slaps a woman.. caught on camera and now instead of performing in Kenya, Kenyans are screaming for him to be deported back to Congo)
I have been wondering what I would do if a guy slapped me..

Is it police, is it feigning death or what would I do?. I probably would walk away in peace then come back with a jug of hot water from wherever and throw it right into… need I complete that..

On a serious note.. what man slaps a woman? That’s uncouth

Ex Chats

‘Hi Winnie.. how are you?’
Not today satan.. no today..

That’s the conversation in my mind with my ex.. well I wish it could be so in reality. Just that it ain’t.

Hi winnie. How are you?

Me: are you gonna die soon?
Ex: No. Why
Me: I thought you were calling to ask if I could be the sole beneficiary of everything you own..
Ex: Can we talk like grown ups?
Me: are you gonna inherit anything from your parents too? That’s awesome. Add that too.
Ex: Winnie please I…
Me: I know.. I know..
Ex: Damn it.. all I want is to know if you are fine
Me: Stop acting nice. It bothers me..
Ex: I ..
Me: bye sweetheart. It’s nice talking again

Church guys let’s talk

Well, I think guys generally are pretty stupid and very bright at the same time.. how that happens, I have no idea. Men can be creative, manipulative and anything with a ve at the end once interested in a woman.. Need I say how annoying they can be if the feeling ain’t mutual?

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Church brothers… I am born again. A Christian and I love God. I pray and go to church. That’s my testimony.

But, let’s agree on something. You  can’t and won’t invite me for a service, prayer session or overnight prayers the famous kesha in Kenya if you have personal interest in me.
If you do that, you could please state your motive is to see me not to see me in church.. Stop avoiding taking me out. And it quite annoys me to think that when I was busy praying, you were busy thinking how I could wash your clothes or be the mother of your kids… And you couldn’t help smiling at the thought of how cute they could be if they inherited my ears..

Get me right, you can invite me.. but after you have stated exactly what your interest is. I don’t want to waste my energy imagining how lucky I am to find a Spiritual father or brother.

Now, if I accompany you to a Kesha, you will remain my spiritual brother. It can’t be more than that.
I won’t accept kesha in exchange of a good meal in quiet restaurant. Forget it..

Change is as good as a rest…
Have an awesome Thursday as you eagerly wait for Weekend..

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The Call

Sometimes letting go does one good than holding on.
My phone vibrates.. it’s weird. Just a few people have this number.
I pick the call absent mindedly..
‘Chege’
‘Hi. How are you?’
I freeze.. No.. this ain’t fair.. you can’t..
‘ what do you want?’

I feel cold. It is soo cold..
‘You know what I always wanted. Can we meet? ‘
‘I have no business meeting you. I am happy now. You can’t take that from me.’

I want to hang up but I can’t.
Thoughts.. memories..

A beautiful Valentine teddy bear.. a woman.. her clothes.. her lipstick..
Her ghost like presence hanging around the house of the guy I wanted most..
The relationship I wanted to work..

Tears… Walking away…

‘Are you there? ‘
‘Yeah.. bye. ‘
I hang up..
I want to wipe away tears.. there is none..
It is just cold

My dear kids..

Hi silly cutes.. I love you all wherever you are.. we have to make this agreement however;
You see, you are still unborn. And I haven’t found a father for you yet.
He will be the best thing that will happen in my life.. yes, even after you are born.
I am beautiful and he will be my choice.. creme de la creme in my life..
Now, all am trying to say is that you can’t disrespect my husband; your father.
You will tame your tongues, manners and anything else that might direct disrespect to my husband.
This guy is my pick, my heart and my life.. waay before you come into my life.
Let’s call a truce before you are even born,  you will respect my husband.
Otherwise babies, just stay wherever you are… it will be safer than if you hang around the earth and disrespect my love

Siku Njema

It is a cold day. I am rubbing my hands together to try to keep warm. The fact that I am overdressed doesn’t help. My head is covered in a black turban. My rubbers are black too..
Well, it has been a good day; siku njema.
‘ You know, you can’t get married when you are this freaking broke.. seriously what are you gonna do with kids anyway? ‘ my friend is saying and I am laughing at how focused she is at making money first..
I shrug my shoulders
‘And who said am getting married? Look at you..  who I am I getting married to anyway? Plus if I can’t buy my gown, then I can’t get married’ ..
She rolls her eyes..
‘Stupid girl.. you think wedding is all about having a good gown.. sometimes I wonder how you ended up this stupid.. Winnie lemme tell you…’
I am laughing at her now..
Then screams..
I dart outside her shop just in time to see the kid we just sold to milk sink into unconsciousness..
Blood drains off my face.. I want to throw up..
‘Careless motorbike riders… I hope that kid doesn’t die.. ‘
No… it was supposed to be a good day.. my siku njema..
No…
‘Are you okay?’
‘I guess’
I feel like death is looming  all over…

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