I am lying on my bed feeling down. My emotions are messing around with me and I give myself a sad smile as I think depression will kick in.

It has been a long week for me. Alternating between home and the library which is freezing by the way. No breaks, no calls and no outs. Speaking of no calls, I cast a glance on my phone. It’s still quiet. A few texts. Calls from mum asking if I am really that hungry. My life is amazing.

I prop the pillow against the wall and lean against it. I push my sad thoughts away and take out the romantic novel by Jill Mansel ‘ Rumor has it’. It’s a funny book. I read a few chapters. My legs get warm and I feel myself drift off. I can’t fight sleep. Not today. I pull my blankets over my head and the Jill Mansel book finds itself on the cold floor.

I am woken up by music. Wait.. I know that song

Here I am still now, broken and in need of you…

Darn it!! My mind wakes up. I grope under my pillow to find it. I quickly slide to answer the call

‘ hello’

‘ hey sweetheart’..

Wtf!! I am fully awake now.

‘ hey. Why are you calling me?’ I ask sourly.

‘ I want to take you out.’ Comes the answer

‘ cut me the crap sugar. Are you sick?? Are you in jail? Is your mother okay’ I ask.

‘ No. I just wanted somebody to talk to. I didn’t have anybody else in mind.’ He answers.

‘ Very funny. We didn’t ever talk. Why do you think we could talk now?? Are you dying?? ‘ I ask.

‘ seriously Winnie. Go out with me.’ He answers and I smile at the trace of desperation in his voice

‘ No babe. Am not going to be your booty call. Have fun if you go out ‘.I answer

I quickly hang up and switch off the phone. I would rather have it silent all night. I slide it under the pillow and pull blankets over my head. I just wish it was my mum who had called.

always winnie

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