I have to confess that I am becoming paranoid. I have started taking notice of people I see when I turn. If you have read my past posts you know I was being watched by a strange guy and to make it worse when I went out to eat with a guy I had fallen for away from school, guess who showed up.. that same guy who used to stalk me or follow me.. whatever he did. All I know is that I don’t want to meet him alone or anywhere near me.
So when someone else mentioned seeing me severally in the library, I decided stalkers have a thing for me.. I know how crazy that sounds. I went to a psychology site and checked out why people attract stalkers. The first thing that came up was fear.. well my friends think overconfidence will kill me. So I cancel that. The next thing is a spouse or an ex.. and I don’t have a crazy ex. Unless they became crazy afterwards..
Something catches my eye though in all those useless answers.. something like projection.. when someone likens you to someone that hurt them, they wanted.. someone in their past. So they are simply going to do to you whatever they would have done to that person. I remember my friend Debbie saying I got that face people think they have seen before. Maybe I look like too many people.. maybe stalkers have seen me before.. I decide I will be changing my Library sitting positions, will go to different sports clubs, will take different routes to the bus station blah blah blah..
So as I walk past Tuskys Pioneer supermarket, an older guy smiles at me and I nod past him. He talks anyway
Are you from school or work??
I turn. He catches up with me and I have to say
Do you want to go for tea? Coffee? Can I go with you??
Wtf!!! I walk fast. He quickens his pace.. I turn and he smiles.
Time to shop.. I immediately get into Nakumatt Moi Avenue supermarket. I can almost touch the disappointment on his face. He looks creepier that way. I think paranoia is taking over me.