Hey dear diary. It has been sometime, right?
Today I wanted to blog but I couldn’t. I don’t want to. All I wanted is to sit and offload what I feel on you because you ain’t gonna tell.. right? And after this I will keep you safe.
It’s quarter to ten and I am in bed. I am listening to the song ‘ when I see you again ‘ by Wiz Khalifa ft Charlie Puth. This song gets me dear diary especially today when I have an emotional breakdown. I wish I could paint what I feel.
It has been a long day. A really long day.
Moving around feeling like a lost soul. Dull pain on my head and the itchy feeling in my chest. The dry cough that has me out of breath. I think am not well. The dizziness that sweeps me off for a moment and for a few seconds I think I will fall off but then I don’t.
Taking a little rest from the days activities then leaving the house to the market and being rained on. I really hate the rains. Shivering from the cold and just getting into the shower for around twenty minutes. Getting off and thinking I would love a long phone call from someone who makes me smile then waking up to the reality of none is coming. You remember what happened to the guy I liked, right diary?? Men can be such morons.
That upsets me a bit more. Just a bit..
Dear diary, when did I start getting upset? I chose my path, right?? I know am paying for it. I am trying to reconcile with the love of my life apart from you that is. I even wrote her a letter. I apologized for taking Saturdays to go out and Sundays rather than training hard. I feel like a cheat. A liar caught. Now I don’t even know if she (badminton) will take me back. I have gained a little weight and my footwork is kind of lost.. what will I do dear diary?? And all this happened when I started hanging out with human beings rather than racquets and shuttles.
I think I will just have to borrow a few lyrics from Khalifa and tell badminton what a long day it has been without her. But this time, I am telling her about it.
Please hope she takes me back.. please
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